Scribbles

Sometimes I need a good ridiculous conversation to really pick me up.

I am not going to bother with a lead in, it's better this way.

Cobra: See, now if I were to have a child with this espresso machine, I wouldn't care if we weren't together...

Me: As long as you could have a cup of coffee every now and then...

Cobra: Haha, I don't drink coffee, but thats not the point.

Me: Well that's why you wouldn't care if you weren't together. You didnt even appreciate her when you had her.

Cobra: THE POINT is, if we had a child and we weren't together I wouldnt care. But I would care if my kid didn't live with me.

Me: He'd have your hair.

Cobra examines the machine.

Cobra: Haha what are these tubes?

Me: Fallopian tubes. Apparently she is a child bearing machine.

Yesterday our printer broke. We ordered a new one that was due today between 9am and 5pm. This new printer is multifunctional so that if our fax machine goes we will have a back up. Well our fax machine went alright. With those two devices down, we weren't able to get any work done before the new one's arrival. It ended up being delivered around noon and Cobra and I scrambled to get everything installed.

We decided it would go in the boss' office in the place of the fax machine. It came with 3 manuals, not one of them English. We tried to install the drivers for about 30 minutes before I concluded that the new system in the boss' office is a mac and it's possible that this printer's drivers can only be installed on a PC. We carried the massive machine into my office and set it up where the old printer used to be. As it turns out, I was right. Problem is, this older PC is very slow. By the time we got everything set up we had to scramble to get  the important documents printed.

The boss came back from a meeting and needed to fax some things. Unfortunately there was is no fax line in my office. So we pick it up and move it back to the boss' office. After several failed attempts to send the fax, she decides that she doesnt want to worry about that anymore and that we need to get the other things done. This would require printing. We did not have any time in the chaos to set up the network. So once again we carried the machine back into my office to print the documents.

This song and dance continued through to the end of the day. In fact, the network is still not set up, so I can only imagine how fun it will be to do this little again dance first thing in the morning. Oh, and that old broken printer will have to be taken down to the basement....

{Word Alert!}

Today a character in one of our breakdowns was described as "neolistic". What the fuck is "neolistic" you ask?

When it comes to the entertainment industry, whether the environment is large or small scale, never say anything about anything out loud. Someone will always over hear you and 90 minutes later you will be asked why you said the things you said by the person you never wanted to know you said it. Word spreads fast.

Also, those in dominant roles can be very mean. I don't know if it is so much who they are as it is them trying to maintain control and gain respect. Personally, I don't care if someone is a complete asshole. If they are good at their job then I can put up with it.

These are common issues that I find to be sensitive in small work environments. So how do you avoid them? Vanilla.

Cobra and I, who seem oddly alike, have devised a plan. In order to avoid becoming a part of anything unpleasant in the office, we will appear to be very dull people. Never excitable or stressed, never too happy or sad, rarely laughing. Just basically doing our work and giving generalized responses like "oh really? That's too bad" and "I'm sure anyone would feel that way."

Going out of our way to appear boring has actually been very entertaining. It also seems to be working. It's only been 2 days but already the stress levels in the office seem more controlled. I feel that it is important for this experiment to continue.

We have created a cure to drama, and that cure is vanilla, it's Cobra and Me to the rescue!

Today I started my new job as a casting assistant. It was pretty quiet due to Easter, the perfect day to start learning. They had just received new computers and we could not really do much until the nerds-on-site dude finished setting everything up. Once he had completed the switch, it was determined that the remaining unused hardware would be stored in the basement.

Enter ME- a young, attractive blonde in her mid 20's. She is new to the office and is aware that a lot of the grunt work will fall on her. She accepts this and is happy to help in anyway she can *cough* kiss ass *cough*.

I started carrying the boxes and old computers down to the main floor only to realize that I was never told where the access to the basement was. I went upstairs and asked the other assistant (I will refer to him from now on by the code name: Cobra...I wanted to be Cobra, but I don't need a code name so whatever...) Anyway, Cobra came down and showed me where the basement was. It wasn't too bad, low ceilings and spider webs, but otherwise it was pretty clean and empty. We put the stuff down and I went back up to get more.

This environment is very tricky. There are moments where it seems as though there is nothing to do because you cannot proceed until others to get back to you, or sign off, or send you materials. Then when you are in the middle of something, other things happen that require you to drop everything and focus all your attention to a new task. This is what continued to happen. I would sit down with the boss, ready to learn something new, and the next thing I know, I am back in the basement.

The phone rings- "I gotta take this, can you take that down to the basement?"

An e-mail comes in- "Shit this has to get done now, can you take this down to the basement too?"

A random thought comes into her head- "I can't focus on this right now, we have to get this other thing done- is there anything else that needs to go to the basement?"

By the end of the day I had made a preemptive strike and taken some extra things into the basement so that there was absolutely nothing else that could possibly go down.

Don't get me wrong, I learned quite a bit in this first day, basics mostly. Things that were easy enough to commit to memory so I didn't end up taking any notes. It was just all over shadowed by how bad my baby cows hurt from going up and down from the basement.

You gotta start at the bottom to get to the top.





Footnotes:

*I will not use the names of the people I work with, nor will I discuss project details.
*Baby cows are what I call my calves.